My what big jaw muscles you have, Aunt Lucy. The better for chewing on roots 10 hours a day, my dear.

Despite cancers, obesity, widespread poverty, and the best efforts of Coca-Cola and Phillip Morris, we are now the healthiest and the prettiest we have ever been in the history of the species. We are living as long or longer than we ever have, and we are dying of old age, not malnutrition, consumption, or childbirth. Evolution is driven by reproduction, and if it came to a reproduction competition between us and the cavemen, we would win hands down. A lot of the time they probably weren't eating well enough to menstruate. Us today, we don't have a kid a year anymore, but we could if we wanted, and they'd all live, and we could feed them too.

OF COURSE we are not evolved (yet) to live on Coke, Skittles, Cheetos, and Krispy Kremes. OF COURSE we are healthier and stronger with fruit, vegetables, meats, and GRAINS. And some of us with milk. (Tho only roughly half the planet---makes the other half strong, tho, apparently. Crazy how evolution works like that.) If you can make a scientifically sound evolutionary argument for any type of food, it would be, hands down, grains. The whole planet of humans has gotten where it has through bread, noodles, and rice. If we measure based on diet, who is winning, the bread-eaters or the hunter-gatherers? Evolution is definitively and uncategorically going to pass on the genes built on grains. Are we going to say that evolutionary biology has determined that bread-eaters are superior and that hunter-gatherers are unfit? If you were a cowboy in the wild west, you would have used this argument to justify shooting Indians, who were savages and going extinct (not withstanding that almost all Indians were farmers, a fact that history intentionally buried because farmer Indians wouldn't have been so clearly savages, and if they weren't so clearly savages, they wouldn't have been so easy to shoot.) Evolutionary arguments make me sick, sicker than Skittles. Besides CrossFitters and cowboys, who makes evolutionary claims? Nazis. The KKK. White supremacists of all kinds, often to justify wholesale murder. (And Gita, but we like him, and he means no harm, and he's with me on this one, I'm pretty sure. :) )

Eat vegetables and meats. They are better for you than donuts. Cut grains out of your diet, if they don't make you feel healthy. But remember Daniel's realization that adding more carbs to a diet that had been nearly Paleo probably made him feel smarter, happier, and more energetic. His study didn't have a foregone conclusion, it didn't overstate its claims---and happily, it didn't rely on psuedo-science, which is not only stupid but dangerous, and has proven to be especially so in its evolutionary guise.

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For my life partner's version of this rant see today's CFEB post, comments. Be sure to click on all the greats to see how cute he is, with those big teeth.